


Behind Blue Eyes

by Caroline



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: M/M, Polyamory, Threesome, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-08
Updated: 2011-05-08
Packaged: 2017-10-19 03:50:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/196553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caroline/pseuds/Caroline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world where vampires were part of the human race and where hunters were no more - their DNA carried by those that were sensitive to vampire kind.   A rare bonded pair of light and dark vampires meet a sensitive who is anything but the norm.   In which Adam Lambert and his bonded partner Sutan Amrull meet one Tommy Joe Ratliff  as Adam is putting together his band for his first solo tour after the release of his first album.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Behind Blue Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> [](http://s10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/xainiver/?action=view&current=bannerksl.jpg)   
> 
> 
> Disclaimer: I know nothing, I'm claiming nothing. No disrespect or infringement is intended. This is a piece of fan fiction and should be treated as such.
> 
> Warnings: Potential dubious consent/non-con at one point. Cannon death of Tommy's father.
> 
> Written for cockbertbigbang over on LJ. The title and the quoted lyrics come from The Who song Behind Blue Eyes and are returned to them and Pete Townsend unharmed. Many thanks and hugs to caarirose and raggedy_edge for all their hand holding and encouragement. More thanks to stageira and akashaelfwitch for their beta work and for making this readable. And finally again to raggedy_edge for the final push that this needed *hugs to one and all*.

_No one knows what it's like_  
To be the bad man  
To be the sad man  
Behind blue eyes 

~*~

**Tommy**

He'd been asked to come back for a second audition, the suits had liked his look enough to send him away to learn, or rather re-learn bass, and come back and audition for Adam. Whether Adam himself had had a hand in that he didn't know and didn't really care. All he cared about right now was nailing it and being offered the job, he'd worry about everything else afterward.

Adam Lambert was going places and he wanted in on the ride.

Bass in hand, he opened the door and two things hit him hard, very fucking hard; one was the combination of vibrations that reverberated round the back of his skull. Vibrations that were out of sync with each other, usually such reverberations were in balance so where the slightly out of tune undertone was coming from, he didn't have a clue. But it most certainly led to the second which was the headache that was starting behind the back of his eyes and the rolling waves of nausea which almost had him doubling over.

So really he wasn't that fucking bothered about trying to work those vibrations and reverberations out, just about getting it to stop and it so would have been nice if he'd been warned before hand.

One vampire was bad enough and required the use of his implants at close quarters, but two? And bonded or mated vampire pairs ought to come with a fucking government health warning.

And ones that weren’t in sync for whatever fucking reason ought to come with big neon signs 'cause the pain these two were setting up was close to having him on the floor right now . Usually he could deal with one 'pire in a room as long as they weren't touching him, but two? Not so much – let alone these two.

And it wasn't as if he hadn't gone into this not knowing what Adam was; a vampire. But who's fucking idea of a joke was this?

Reaching up he touched the small metal disk behind his left ear, the one that was no bigger than the pad of his index finger and keyed to his DNA and his only. Exactly two seconds later, the pain and nausea reduced, though there were some lingering effects – shadows hanging around that no amount of technology could totally cancel out.

The implants themselves reacted to imbalances in the chemicals and automatically corrected for those. Sensitive's could learn to read the signs in themselves and turn them on and off via the disk behind their ear, so usually they could catch things before they happened. Though, for some reason that didn't make any sense to him, a lot of the older generations hadn't hadn't learned that trick and they just tended to avoid 'pires where ever possible.

It was was only really in his generation and younger that had really started to learn and recognize when they needed their implants and when they didn't.

But now at least he could function and get on with what he'd come here to do. Or he would have been able to get on with what he'd been brought here to do, if it hadn't been for the three voices in the room; swearing one in English and two in a language he didn't recognize, as his eyes bled from his natural dark brown to very pale sky blue. The only real side effect of the electronics in his skull and the one indicator everybody knew vampire, weres, and human kind alike.

The English came from the guy who was sat next to Adam Lambert, who he recognized to be Monte Pitman. The other voice, aside from Adam's, came from a the tall, skinny, dark haired, dark eyed and dark skinned man that seemed to appear behind Adam with his fingers resting against Adam's shoulder. Tall skinny guy had been over the far corner of the room until that moment.

Show off vampires.

“You're a sensitive.”

Thank you for stating the obvious Mr. Pittman.

“Is that going to be a problem?”

Okay, so usually sensitives and 'pires didn't see eye to eye. Blinding migraines might have had something to do with that, but testing and the fitting of implants at birth more or less negated that.

And it had been over one hundred and fifty years since the Humans Act had been passed and anyway 'pries, 'weres and others were human in some form or other after all. And he did sincerely believe that.

So it was more fundamental than that, something buried back in myth and legends that really no one seemed to understand these days, an animosity that just seemed to be hard coded in to sensitive's genes.

Really for a sensitive being round 'pires usually felt vaguely uncomfortable and made you feel that kind of underlying feeling of disgust, possibly mixed up with a little bit of fear that most people get round spiders.

Which as far as he was concerned, was no reason to hate them 'specially given that a sensitive's implants tended to sort that out anyway. And even though a lot more of the younger sensitives were beginning to think as he did - that they at least ought to live and let live if nothing else; the elders of both communities hadn't got that far yet.

So as a result most of the time 'pires and sensitives just didn't mix.

'Cept when they did but no one mentioned those.

“No, shouldn't be a problem at all.” His smile was a little wry and more in his eyes than touching his lips, he knew that. He knew his reaction was different from what was expected from a sensitive but they were no less honest and truthful for all that - they were as different as he was different.

And that was all he had to say on the matter. “So, we doing this thing then?”

**Sutan**

A 'tive. Just what was needed right now.

He could feel the disquiet and confusion that was coming off Adam in waves; in fact he'd have probably felt it even if they weren't bonded. He was pretty sure even Monte who was about as sensitive as a plank of wood could feel it. Let alone the guy with the skunk hair stood waiting to audition for them.

He'd been with Adam when Adam had looked through the pictures that the suits had sent, he'd felt Adam's pull to this one - not just the physical beauty of the man but something else as well, something that wasn't quite defined but could be the potential of something else.

But now the whatever it was that had called to Adam from just looking at those pictures was now slowly turning to puzzlement, for both him and Adam.

He and Adam were a bonded pair, not mated, and no that didn't mean they didn't have sex, they did regularly and often – spectacularly even; even after all the years they've been together.

The reason they weren't mated was because they only shared blood on rare occasions – he didn't feed Adam; he couldn't, his blood was dangerously addictive for Adam – for any vampire of Adam's type. In fact they were two very different types of vampires not just from different clans but almost different species though all vampires were genetically human as a basis.

Adam was a blood vampire, a member of the dark, created and not born – needing donated blood to survive. Though really, the old stories and traditions of Adam's kind were exaggerated beyond belief. While Sutan was a member of the light, born into his gifts and what was mistakenly referred to as an energy vampire. He needed life force to survive, but he neither took or stole energy from humans. His one supply of that was Adam and only Adam.

If he'd never met Adam, he would have lived and died a natural human life not coming into his vampiric gifts without having found his bonded though obviously he'd been brought up as potentially a blood vampire's bonded. His kind were rare and special and as such, guarded and treasured by the vampire community. His bond with Adam extended his life and for Adam it reduced his hunger and helped control his need to feed from a live human source; which meant that Adam could move more easily, amongst the rest of human kind with no danger to himself or them.

And it didn't hurt that they loved each other deeply either. Of course not all members of the dark had or even needed a bonded especially in this day and age. But it was who they were and had been for a good long while.

He had known that during their years, make that probably centuries together (they were going on a couple or three of those already), that Adam would be drawn to another; someone Adam would want as his mate and maybe even as a childer. He had no problems with that, that's how their kind were and how they'd always been.

But a 'tive?

Which of the gods was messing with them this time?

**Adam**

He could feel his bonded's concern for him as well as feel Sutan's natural reaction to a sensitive being close, it almost mirrored his own.

Almost.

He could also feel Sutan's interest, even though he didn't think Sutan recognized it as that – yet. It wasn't interest in the sexual sense or even in the sense of 'maybe I could like this guy', it was interest in finding out what made Tommy tick.

Why Tommy was different. And he was.

Not just Tommy's almost casual acceptance of him and Sutan, which was unusual to say the least. But the pull he'd felt towards Tommy and had done since he'd seen the first picture which he felt even more now that Tommy was in the room; though it was more colored with confusion now as vampires and 'tives didn't mix.

While most sensitives didn't understand why, both he and Sutan were old enough to know exactly why. Both of them remembered when their kind were hunted and by whom, and while hunters bloodlines were now mostly so thinned down that most 'tives really didn't need the implants these days, they were still descended from hunters and that still was enough to have the hair on the back most vampires necks standing on end.

Which Tommy didn't and that was even with those wretched implants in his skull humming.

All in all it was odd, very odd.

As he watched, Monte took Tommy through his paces, a couple of base lines from a couple of tracks from his album and then a couple of other numbers followed by some free form jamming.

And as he sat there watching and wondering he saw that moment, the moment where Monte and Tommy clicked, the moment where the core of his band was formed and he couldn't help but smile.

He also knew the moment Sutan saw what he saw too. The fingers against his shoulder tightening briefly as Sutan's mind gently brushed against his through their bond.

A kiss on butterfly wings.

Catching Monte's eyes, the nod of his head asking the question, the one he got in return answering it just before he stood, hugging Sutan as he did. “Thank you, Mr. Ratliff, we'll be in touch.”

*~*

**Tommy**

He thought things had been going quite well considering. Adam and Sutan, it seemed, were trying to be careful round him; by trying not to be around him together where ever possible or warning him before hand if it couldn't be avoided.

Though he didn't really understand what was going on with them – well actually he did, he got that they were bonded. What he didn't get was what was actually different about them.

Because something sure as hell was. Or rather Sutan was different, he knew what Adam was, the resonance in the back of his skull whenever he was in the room told him that even if the discarded blood packets hadn't. It was Sutan that was odd, not only were that 'pires vibrations wrong, as a bonded pair Adam and Sutan didn't ring true; they should have been balanced in his head and they were, but they were unbalanced as well.

He was still trying to puzzle it out when the AMAs happened and all hell broke loose.

Adam had never made a secret of the fact that he was a 'pire though he hadn't actually gone on stage on Idol and said it outright, the rumor mill had started very early and he'd never denied it nor confirmed it either while still on the show. But once it was over, Adam had 'come out' – if you could call it that – in Rolling Stone a few weeks after Idol was done.

What had been hidden in full view though was Sutan, but that was their thing to worry about and not his, and he wasn't starting now. It wasn't as if he was interested really, anyway. It was just that he was the kind of person that didn't much like a puzzle – that's all that was.

Which was all well and good until some 'clever' fan had spotted something just before Adam had kissed him and had slowed the video down enough to catch the tell tale movement of Adam catching his hand and bringing it up so he could activate his disk before kissing him.

Though how a 'pire knew that tick he didn't know, but there was bigger things to be worried about right now than that.

Not only did they have certain members of human kind up in arms about Adam kissing him on TV in front of a million or so people, they now had a number of their respective communities screaming from the roof tops as well. Sensitives about how a 'pire was corrupting an innocent sensitive and vampires railing how a 'tive had beguiled a vampire.

It was enough to give him a headache that even the wizardry in his skull couldn't cope with and he wasn't the one fending it off from all sides.

He couldn't be the only one to have noticed that Sutan was looking a little grey round the gills surely?

And he wasn't starting to worry about that either.

**Sutan**

Sutan was pretty sure that there were people out there who thought that Tommy Joe was some clueless Californian boy but he isn't one of them. Tommy wasn't clueless at all, in fact Tommy was about as sharp as they came but quiet with it. The blond picked up on things quickly and he knew that Tommy had worked out that somehow he was different to Adam and he was also well aware that Tommy had worked out that something wasn't quite right with him currently as well.

It's not that there was anything that was majorly wrong, not really, it was more simply a matter of logistics. Logistics that hadn't allowed him and Adam to spend that much time together alone in the last few days - which quite frankly sucked and also meant that he hadn't had a chance to feed.

Normally feeding from Adam wouldn't be something that he'd have to put any conscious effort into or even pay any attention to as such, it was usually an added bonus to their very healthy sex life, in that being that laid that open and bare with each other meant that feeding happened as a natural extension of their sex lives.

So it only became a problem when they hadn't had a chance to be together for a few days and hadn't had a chance to sleep together – like right now.

It became even more of problem in that to feed him under these circumstances. Adam needed to feed from a live donor and not just as blood bag - which was something Adam could do ninety percent of the time thanks to their bond.

But the stuff they put in the blood in blood bags to prolong their shelf life, meant that Adam couldn't metabolize that kind of blood fast enough to replace the energy drain that would happen when he hadn't fed in a couple of three days.

While it wouldn't really hurt his bonded not to have live supply, it would give Adam one heck of a hangover with the need to sleep three or four days straight included. Not something any of them could afford right now, least of all Adam.

And for Adam's well being it would also better if he fed the moment that Adam did or just after Adam does. All of which means that the donor has to be present when he feeds, not something he's overly comfortable with.

The final thing to add into this little mix is that when he has to feed like this, when it has to become a conscious thought and not just a very pleasant side effect it feels a bit like a cold mud bath from the inside out - slightly sickening, cold, and slimy. In other words, altogether unpleasant.

In the end, Tommy pins him down with a simple look that doesn't say anything but asks all the right questions and probably some of the wrong ones as well.

But he's too tired, too hungry, and too stressed out not to answer and he finds he cannot let Tommy tug him close while he talks. Though, he says nothing about Tommy's fingers carding through his hair as he gives up one of his kind's best kept secrets to someone with hunter's blood in their veins.

Neither does he say a word when Tommy corners Adam the moment he walked into their rehearsal space - late and tired from yet another grilling from some or other reporter who thinks they have the right to preach at Adam.

In fact, not a word is spoken as Tommy drags them both in the little office that's now doubling up as relaxation space; locks the door, and offers Adam his wrist, telling Adam to do what he needs to do. Even less is said as Adam's fangs drop and Adam bites into the offered flesh; neither he nor Adam is in any state to refuse a willing donor and he's in no place to call either of them on it.

Which he is probably how he ends up taking what he needs from Adam, pressed up against Adam their lips melded together while Tommy is still tucked in against Adam's side.

For once he didn't feel cold while it happened, he felt warm and even though feeding that way was still unpleasant it wasn't as bad as it could have been. And though it was odd and strange to see sky blue eyes as opposed to chocolate ones, watching him it didn't feel wrong.

Not at all.

**Adam**

He knows things have changed; he can see it – sense it. But the chances of them talking about it?

Zip and none.

He fed from a 'tive for fuck sake. That's something you just didn't do. While it's not expressly forbidden or anything like that, it was a line you certainly didn't cross. Well, expect for those who did and you didn't talk about them, not even in the hushed corners where all the best gossip is discussed.

There was a time that doing anything intimate, let alone that intimate with a 'tive – or a hunter as they were back then – would have ended up with your head removed.

But as human kind mellowed over the centuries and lost their fear of vampires, their kind mellowed as well. The last true hunters had died natural deaths just after he was made and as the fear of vampires was lost, fascination began to take its place and as that grew, acceptance slowly began to take a foot hold in some quarters until finally there was more acceptance than not - enough that the elders felt it was time for them come out of the shadows, so to speak. Though there would probably always be purists and bigots on any and all sides – it was pretty much human nature after all.

He can see the things that have changed between them even if none of them were willing to admit to them. Tommy had become closer to Sutan. In fact, that boy seemed to be turning into a cuddle slut where his bonded was concerned. But it was so much more than that; Tommy watched Sutan like a hawk Sutan wasn't looking or rather when Tommy thought neither he nor Sutan were aware. Watching over his bonded, when he himself couldn't, making sure they was space for them to have an hour or so here or there in the madness, allowing him time to feed Sutan.

He was pretty sure that Tommy had put two and two together and worked out actually how he fed Sutan and that what had happened between them wasn't how it normally worked. 'Specially if the color of Tommy's cheeks on that occasion had been anything to go by.

Somehow he didn't think Sutan had noticed though. Sutan didn't really notice those kind of things – but what Sutan had pointed out to him was something that he hadn't noticed himself and he didn't think Tommy had either. But recently it seemed that Tommy's eyes rarely bleed to blue around Sutan. Only if Sutan was truly agitated about something and then that disk behind Tommy's ear came into play very fast indeed.

So no, they weren't talking about it and probably never would – but the direction they were moving in was all for the good.

In fact, if the way his band was shaping up was anything to go by, all things were moving in the right direction. Monte and Tommy just got each other and they both got where he wanted to go with things.

Really for all the furor the AMAs had caused, things really couldn't be better.

*~*

**Tommy**

He loved being on tour, absolutely loved it. There is no other way to describe it. The rush of being on stage behind Adam as Adam strutted his stuff, the buzz that the music gave him and that one was something that surprised him.

Not that he hadn't known Adam was good and that Adam's stuff was good; it's just that there's a big difference between knowing that something is technically good and appeals to people and actually finding that you like and enjoy it yourself.

After all, his iPod is full of the likes of Metallica and Manson, not the likes of Kris Allen and David Cook. Though lumping Adam in with the likes of Allen and Cook is like saying that Jack Daniels was the same as red wine.

And the fans were very cool – though some of them were more than a little odd and intense. But most of them are okay and really he was not going to object to the attention. He wouldn't have been in this business if he didn't want the attention. On the quiet, he'll even admit he got quite a kick out of the reaction to his and Adam's 'fan service', as everyone seems to be calling Adam kissing him during Fever.

But it's not just that it's the second round of screams he gets when they separate and his eyes are blue, even if most of the people in the crowd can't actually see him that closely – they know. They know from the moment that Adam steps in front of him and guides his hand slowly up behind his ear, before kissing him, whichever way that Adam's going to that night.

That's a different kind of buzz altogether.

He knows they're doing something important for all Adam saying he's not a spokesman or a role model. He knows they are they both are, but he's not really sure how that happened or even why it's happened – maybe it was just the right place at the right time? It's not something he's thought about really either.

It just is.

But he knows from the stories told to him by sensitives; some younger than him some not - told quietly in corners or whispered into his ear; stories of friendships with 'pires that they're families and elders frown upon that they're doing something.

And he knows Adam's probably hearing similar stories from the other side of the coin, even if they don't talk about it. Though there is this part of him that feels they should. That it's important.

And that's another thing; you talk about things like that with people you care for, with your friends. When did he and Adam actually become friends? He could tell you when he and Sutan got to that point, but him and Adam? He doesn't really have a clue – not as such, it was just another of those things.

Not that it's a problem, he kinda likes the fact that the three of them get on so well. In fact the whole troupe gets on really well, and they're a mixed bunch to say the least; gay, straight, a couple more 'pires and even another sensitive among the road crew. A group of people, who by rights really shouldn't get on, but they all do; all because of Adam fucking Lambert.

And that would really scare him it if didn't make him smile so much.

**Sutan**

As far as he was concerned, there was no doubt about it. Adam and Tommy were hot on stage together and there was also no doubt that Tommy got Adam hot, not that he thought for one moment that Tommy really knew it as such – occasional physical evidence aside.

But he did, he was very pleasantly aware and not just from the bond between himself and Adam. His ass was aware of it as well. And if he had been the kind to be jealous, he'd probably be threatening Adam's dick right about now, but he isn’t, so he doesn't.

He's enjoying the ride, encouraging the blossoming friendship and the deeper feelings he has sensed beneath that; the ones forming between Adam and Tommy - though he doesn't think either Adam or Tommy have quite worked that one out yet.

And maybe if he falls a little bit in love with Tommy along the way too what would be the problem with that? Nothing at all as far as he could see.

The tour moved on at a pace things going well, almost too well it seemed.

The news about Tommy's father had been difficult to say the least but were there was life, there was hope. And they all hoped - everyone on the tour.

But sometimes hope wasn't enough and Tommy's father had passed, leaving them without Tommy for a few days. And in those few days he'd felt as though there was something missing – as though there was this tear in his bond with Adam and he guessed that Adam had felt it too – though neither of them said anything about it, it was another of those things they weren't talking about.

But both he and Adam understood what Tommy was going through, possibly in ways that others couldn't and wouldn't after all they'd seen so many friends and family die as they lived on. That was one of the crosses that every vampire had to bear.

And when Tommy came back, both he and Adam had made every effort to give Tommy the space he needed, not to make things any the more painful for him. They'd both stepped back a little and tried to avoid spending too much time with Tommy by themselves and even less time with Tommy together. Neither of them wanting Tommy to have to use his implants more than absolutely necessary - the less Tommy had to use his implants the less discomfort Tommy was in.

So when Tommy had stormed into his and Adam's room on the tour bus, he'd been more than a little floored. Even more so when Tommy had read him the riot act, blinking against the tears that were obviously threatening to fall, about how friends should treat friends and that didn't include not being there when they were needed. The words had tumbled from Tommy's lips in a torrent tripping over themselves, distress winding through them which just seemed to make things worse for Tommy, rather than relieving the pain the blond was in.

So Sutan did the only thing he could think off to stem the flow of words he kissed him - kissed Tommy.

And Tommy kissed him back, their fingers tangling when Tommy reached up to activate his disk When they broke apart both of them needing to breathe, he was looking down into blue eyes not brown.

“Again.”

Tommy's word breathed over his lips as Tommy pushed up on tip toe to kiss him; their tongues tangling, a faint whimper from one of them swallowed by the other. It wasn't just about want and need; he knew that, though that was there too. It was about reconnecting about letting Tommy know that he did care, that Adam cared. And it wasn't as if Adam didn't have some clue about what was happening between him and Tommy; his and Adam's bond was buzzing with it.

“Bed.”

The pain that wound through the need in that one word was like a bucket of ice down his back. He knew that tone and recognized it for what it was, which wasn't just the need that was pressed against his thigh. It said that Tommy was on the edge of breaking and to give in to heat and want rather than to take care of the real need would be have been unforgivable. So they'd ended up on the bed with Tommy's biting kisses against his lips and Tommy's desperation rutting against his thigh.

He'd let Tommy take what he'd needed and more importantly he'd let Tommy break apart in his arms.

The tears that he suspected hadn't fallen when they should have - with Tommy having to be strong for his mom, sister, and family came after. And he held Tommy through that storm as well, giving him a safe harbor and a place to rest.

Once it had abated, he'd showered them both loaning Tommy as spare pair of his sleep pants to wear before settling them both down. Tommy tucked against his side, his fingers sliding through Tommy's hair, petting gently; as sleep slowly found them both.

**Adam**

He'd been out doing some after gig promo work, which was why he hadn't been with Sutan when whatever the hell it was that had happened between Sutan and Tommy had happened. His bond with Sutan had sung both with pain and pleasure but whatever it had been it was calm now - so he reached into the back of the little 'fridge on the bus and retrieved a blood bag, decanting it into a mug; warming it in the microwave and taking it to the small lounge area. Instead of charging into the bedroom which had been his first instinct.

He needed the time and the silence, needed space to breathe and process, even if he wasn't going to think about anything in particular.

He knew they needed to talk; him and Sutan, him and Tommy, all three of them. But now was not the time, even if there were bonds forming between them all. He also knew Sutan didn't think he was aware of the one that was forming between himself and Tommy; but he was aware and very aware of what it had the chance to become and had been since he'd fed from Tommy.

It called the word mate to him, adding to the pull that he'd felt when he seen that first picture of Tommy. Making it real and not some puzzle to be solved.

But what he didn't think Sutan realized was that Sutan was forming his own bond with Tommy, it hadn't been a single tear in his and Sutan's bond when Tommy hadn't been there, there had been two – small ones admittedly and easily repaired, but still there nonetheless.

And right now wasn't the time, so they'd be avoiding the elephant in the room for a bit longer yet.

Supper finished, he washed his mug out and put it away, calmer than he had been when he'd first returned - when sex, blood, lust, and pain had still been singing along the edges of his and Sutan's bond.

Now all he could feel was calm and a touch of peacefulness that hadn't been there before. Pushing open the bedroom door, he couldn't help but smile at the sight of Sutan and Tommy sleeping. Sutan spooned against Tommy protecting him again the monsters of the night. He knew that thought to be rubbish, that Tommy was pretty good at looking after himself – most of the time, but that's how it seemed to him and it sounded right to him, so he was going to go with it.

Stripping off and slipping into his own pair of sleep pants he slid in behind Sutan; spooning up against him, hand resting against Sutan's hip, fingers just touching Tommy's, and let the calm and peace take him into sleep.

He wasn't quite sure what drew him from his rest, it wasn't Sutan the bond between them was still covered in a blanket of sleep, but resting on his head on his hand he found curious brown eyes ringed with blue looking back at him over Sutan's shoulder. A tired, slight wry and possibly apologetic smile touching Tommy's lips. As he watched Tommy touched his disk and the eyes looking at him bled into full blue and he reached over drawing a finger down the back of Tommy's hand. “Don't worry about it.”

All it took from him was a few simple words and a touch and Tommy's smile brightened. He knew that in reality it was going to take time that there was no magical fix or cure. But he couldn't help the warmth that Tommy's smile brought.

He could quite easily live with waking up like this. It felt right and it felt right to go with that. “You know any time you want to sleep with us you're more than welcome.” And no that wasn't an offer of sex, not that he thought either he or Sutan would object if that's what Tommy really wanted and Tommy's eyes told him that. That Tommy got what he was talking about.

“Thank you, I might just take you up on that sometime.”

Tommy's words were tinged with shyness but rang true and he wasn't going to ask for anything more than that.

And no, they still weren't going to talk about it.

*~*

**Tommy**

He was glad to be home, he'd loved being on tour, but by the end of it he just wanted to be home; wanted his own bed, wanted the familiar. He loved the family that Adam had created - Adam's Glamily loved being with them, but at the end of it it had almost become too much – he'd needed a break and needed to breath.

Adam and Sutan were in Paris and he was house hunting, now that Tommy had a bit of money he and Mike were going to move up in the world a bit.

It was strange sleeping alone, again, though; he'd gotten so used to being with Adam and Sutan, having two bodies, one warm, one cool wrapped round him. That he missed sharing their bed and he missed them if he was honest.

And there was also something else he couldn't quite put his finger on, a bit like an itch he couldn't scratch, or an insect bite that was niggling at him. Maybe he just needed to cut out the alcohol for a bit and cut back on implant use, hopefully that would fix things.

So he made himself a little list of things to do and people he wants to see, it was good to concentrate and focus. Doing so was the kind of thing that stopped him from doing house work at three in the morning and upsetting the guys he shared his apartment with.

By the time he'd eventually caught up with everyone he wanted too, he'd almost killed the week before the first Jingle Ball show, which left really only one person he wanted to see before then and that was Mia.

And she took one look at him, then listened what he had to say - then dragged him off to meet a couple of friends of hers. Mia wasn't exactly sensitive but she was certainly something or it could just be that she knew him very well; he was never quite sure about that one.

Which is how he found himself meeting a 'pire who was mated to a sensitive.

One of those things you didn't talk about and he'd just spent a good few hours talking with them. Which left him with one helluva 'oh fuck' ringing in his head. But he'd learned more in that time than he'd ever learnt in all the years his elders had been trying to teach him shit.

He'd learned where his gifts had originated from and very quickly understood why sensitives gave 'pires the creeps and visa versa. Though these days it seemed that his level of sensitivity was becoming rarer and rarer; which had had him comparing himself to Sutan with a smile touching his lips at that thought. And that had drawn pleased and surprised chuckles from his hosts at his easy acceptance of the idea. It also seemed that a sensitive that spent a lot of time with 'pires tended to be come de-sensitized some, or at least to the 'pires they mixed with.

He'd learned that a non 'pire mating with a vampire could be a prospective childer but not always, something about it having to be the human's choice – but a lot more complicated than that apparently. And that a childer wasn't always a mate, though mostly they were because of the mating bond and blood already shared tended to make being turned easier.

And the most important thing that he learned, was that he'd started to form bonds with Sutan and Adam. Bonds that would dissolve over time if they did nothing about them and were, as his hosts put it, 'a one time offer' only, so no chance of it happening again - apparently; though that didn't necessarily preclude other types of bonds forming. All in all it sounded a little complicated and a whole lot interesting, if he was honest. Not that he said that to his hosts, wanting the time to think things over a bit.

What it all really boiled down to was that they he, Adam, and Sutan needed to talk. Though as was pointed out by his hosts as he left 'be sure what you want'. And to be sure where his emotions lay, as 'eternity' was one fucking long time.

**Sutan**

Paris, they were in Paris and no, it wasn't the Spring, it was December and it was very cold; but still Paris – he loved Paris. It had been so long since they'd been here, but Paris held some beautiful memories for them and was still beautiful now; even if there were more people, more noise, and more dirt. Paris was still a city of light. And a place that called to him and Adam both. The museums, galleries, the history; oh and of course, let’s not forget the shopping either.

It had almost been enough too, almost, but not quite. And not even the willing donor they'd brought with them tipped it over into being enough. Adam had met Sauli in Finland while doing some promotional stuff ; contacting Sauli just before the tour ended to invite Sauli to spend the week with them in Paris – Adam liked Sauli and as Adam had said when suggesting inviting Sauli, Sauli was fun.

Like all donors Sauli was aware which ride he was on and for how long, and had no problem with that. And it didn't hurt that Sauli made both himself and Adam smile. But Sauli didn't fill the gap, the gap that neither of them were talking about.

Sauli was just a nice bit of relaxation.

But that certainly didn't mean that he and Adam weren't having fun, enjoying coming down off the tour together; Or that they weren't enjoying having time together, just them - they were a lot and Sauli was sensible enough to go find things to do every now and then, giving time alone to be together.

There was no doubt he was loving it, loving having Adam's sole attention centered on him again, if only for a little while. He's been brought flowers, jewelry, and clothes. They've walked down the Seine together, been round the Louve, visited Notre Dame, and done all the touristy things.

They've also walked down the little alleyways they'd walked the first time they were here and rediscovered the little cafes they knew of old. So while somethings change, somethings still remain the same.

Which is the way things have always been and he assumed always will be.

Sauli left them the night before they're due to fly back, leaving them one more night of peace before the last four shows; two Jingle Balls and two homing coming gigs in LA to wrap things up.

One more night to themselves and he was going to make it special for them. Slipping away from Adam for any time to do anything, had been difficult, but with Sauli's help he'd grabbed some moments here and there to get what he needed. Getting Adam out of their room had proved trickier, but a couple of long distance phone calls and Lane had been good enough to set up a one off interview for Adam – which had had Adam swearing about ruining their last evening together but had worked to get Adam out of their room.

Using the time he had well, he lit the candles and incense, filled the bath adding just a tiny amount of very old and very precious oil. And then blended Adam's favourite massage oil from the essential oils he kept with him and the almond oil he'd purchased in one of those grabbed moments.

And then he waited.

**Adam**

To say he was fuming as he stalked back to their room would be putting it very mildly, to say the very least. But as he opened the door, he could quite literally feel his anger draining from him; the room was bathed in the gentle light of a dozen or so candles, he could see the bath had been run, and his senses easily pick up the bath and massage oil that Sutan had mixed.

As the door closed behind him and he stepped further into the room, Sutan took his hand and led him over to the vanity and slowly removed his makeup, followed by his clothes. Nuzzling and kissing against each newly laid bared piece of skin.

Once he was completely naked, Sutan wound their fingers together and led him into the bathroom. As he climbed into the water and relaxed, Sutan removed his own clothes before kneeling to bathe him and he couldn't help but bliss out on the attention he was receiving.

They didn't do this kind of thing often, for a myriad of reasons – but the main one is that for Sutan, it could become painful very easily, to consciously touch him like this over any length of time and not feed from him.

And that Sutan would do this for him under those circumstances just makes it all the more special.

As the water slowly turned cold he was dried and led back to bedroom, and guided to lie down on the towels that have been spread on the bed. He was led on his front, head pillowed on his arms as Sutan started at his feet and slowly ever so slowly, moved up his body – working scented oil into his skin and working out tensions he didn't even know he had.

By the time that Sutan is leaning over him, fingers working at the base of his skull, his cock was heavy and hard against his belly, constrained against the covers in that pleasantly uncomfortable way. His breathing was ragged and uneven and he was afloat in a place that was a combination of being cool and relaxed and hot with need and lust.

As he felt Sutan lean forward, Sutan's hard cock dragged over the cleft of his ass, drawing a low moan from him.

“You want something, baby?”

Sutan words whispered gently against his ear, the feel of Sutan's breath skimming over the shell earned his bonded a shudder and had him moving restlessly, trying to ease the ache in his cock.

The brush of Sutan's chest against his back, sliding through the oil on his skin had him moaning softly, arching to feel the drag of Sutan's cock as well. Bring himself slowly to his knees he offered himself to his bonded. Not something he did very often either.

“Oh honey, I'm going to take such good care of you.”

And he knows Sutan would.

*~*

**Tommy**

He walked off stage handing his bass to his tech; as he did so, and that's it, they're done - the last show of Adam Lambert's Glamnation tour.

The cheers and screams still ringing in his ears, the music still thrumming though his blood and the connections he is now vary aware of, thanks to Mia's friends humming quietly in the background.

And now more than at any time during the time since Adam and Sutan got back from Paris, he realizes just how much missed them and missed those connections when they weren't together. Something else for him to add into the pile of things he really, really needs to think about.

Along with the now, that he knows what he does, he's noticed that when he is with Adam and Sutan the resonance in the back of his skull seems to be more balanced and in tune; something he'd not noticed before or probably not paid any attention to as, thinking about it, it seemed to have happened over time, as though maybe he kind of balances them in a way. Not something he would have ever thought about until things had been pointed out to him.

The first LA show had been all about Adam and Monte (and by the same token Sutan) about their past and about celebrating that and where they were now. The party after the show had been all that and more, it had been the wrap up for the tour; there had been friends, family, sires, and mates. It had been a fantastic and fun night.

This night's show had been a celebration and a thank you for the tour; it was something for them to share with the fans. And the after show party had been a private party, just Glamily in their celebration of the tour. It was their closure; their new beginning, and glasses raised to friendships that would last a life time.

Which is how he ended up back in Adam and Sutan’s hotel room after things had wound down. And really none the wiser than he had been when Mia had dragged him over to meet her friends.

He still didn't know and still wasn't sure of what it would mean to him if the three of them did bond. Or how it would work if they did.

But he couldn't say confusion reigned, because it didn't, it just felt right being here with them.

They sat on the bed, Adam resting against the head board; with him, sitting between Adam's thighs back to chest and Sutan sat cross legged in front of them. How they ended up as they had he didn't have a clue, though it might have had something to do with wine bottle or three that were on the floor by the bed.

Sutan's finger brushed over his cheek bone, catching both his and he thought Adam's attention

“You know we ought to talk about this.”

Both he and Adam hummed in agreement, he could tell that Adam wasn't really interested in talking as such – just that Adam was simply content as they were. So was Sutan really, though he could feel the edges of Sutan needing to know what was going on, as well as the occasional brushes against not just his mind, but also his being; checking that he was okay, content and happy with whatever the hell was going on between them all.

And he was.

*~*

**Sutan**

“You know we ought to talk about this.” Even though the words left his lips he knew full well they weren't going to to; not really or not now at least. The bonds forming between them were alive with residue from the gig and from the contentment of them all being together.

The bonds between them would either be sealed in blood or would dissolve if Tommy chose not to accept them; and the thought of Adam opening up a wound on Tommy's throat and on his, just so they could share a few drops between them, made his dick twitch. Okay, so they could do that with a pin prick to a finger tip, but honestly the thought of Adam biting both of them had him shuddering.

He suddenly found himself the focus of two sets of eyes, a focus so intense that it almost stole his breath away. As he watched Tommy crawling from in between Adam's legs until he was kneeling in front of him, a moment that reminded him so much of the feline that Adam tended to call Tommy. Though not the pretty kitty that Adam suggested Tommy was, but the wildness of a predator - big cat. In that moment he saw what Tommy could become if he ever agreed to Adam turning him.

And he knew Adam saw it as well, he didn't need to be able feel that through his and Adam's bond. Sutan could see it in the way Adam sat up and the smile that curled over Adam's lips – it was probably a good thing that Tommy was focused on him right now. Even though Tommy had known them over a year and had fed Adam, Tommy had never truly seen - Adam the vampire – seen Adam as he was seeing him now. And that had nothing to do with whether Adam's fangs were down or not.

“What were you thinking about?”

There was a little amusement in Tommy's tone but it was all wound up in a lot of heat, very sensuous heat; the kind that bushed over his skin and tried to force his blood south. “About Adam biting us both, about tasting him and you.”

Tommy leaned forward to nuzzle against him, breathing the next words against his skin, making him both feel as well as hear them.

“You really, like the idea of that don't you?”

He couldn't help but softly moan his agreement.

“It doesn't happen that often does? Adam feeding from you?”

Though the tone in Tommy's words sounded much the same, but it was not difficult to tell that the question is a bit more serious as there was touch curiosity threading through the words. “No, it has to happen twice a year – but my blood is very addictive for him and much more than that could end up being very dangerous, for both of us.”

This time Tommy crawled into his lap nipping at his bottom lip, asking entry and drawing his tongue out to play while Tommy hummed acknowledgement and understanding into his mouth. The bond between himself and Adam, flashing with both love and lust as he deepened and took control of the kiss; his hand coming round to cup the back of Tommy's skull, the other resting against Tommy's hip. The kiss breaking as another question tumbles from Tommy's lips.

“If I do this, will I be able to feed you too?”

He didn't honestly know the answer to that, well he did partly; in that if Tommy was turned, then yes no doubt, but until then would a bond between them all be enough for him to feed? He didn't know but he was willing to find out.

Moving Tommy off his lap earned him a pout, one that had a good measure of 'what the hell?' mixed up in it, as well which had him smiling; after all it was very cute.

Reaching out, he took both of Tommy's hands in his and then relaxed as though meditating before pushing out with that part of him that would seek the energy from Tommy if he was going to feed from him; much the same way he'd done with Adam that day when Tommy had acted as Adam's donor.

It wasn't a pleasant feeling; in fact, it was highly unpleasant – but not the same unpleasant as it usually was if he'd tried this with a human. This time it was a sharp prickly sensation, something like reaching out into a hot flame.

Now, with any other human that sensation would fling him back into himself and kick off a headache from hell the kind that would lay him flat for days, but with Tommy it wasn't quite the same, he could feel something in Tommy reaching up to meet him.

Something that made him think that if Tommy did choose, that maybe he could feed from him.

Though when both he and Tommy pulled back, he was squinting against the light as a headache from hell started to kick in. Which in turn had Tommy reaching for his disk to turn the implants on for the first time that night. Turning Tommy's eyes blue and he assumed lessening any headache that Tommy might be feeling.

As Tommy eyes turned fully blue the blond for some reason that Sutan doesn't understand at all Tommy reached his hands out, it's an action that seemed to be almost instinctual - something that's buried deep in a corner of Tommy's mind is telling Tommy that he ought to do this.

There's also this look of curiosity on Tommy's face as though Tommy had just thought of something he hadn't been expecting.

Gentle fingers touch the skin of Sutan's temples rubbing in small circles, soothing and easing his headache, pushing back the pain until it slowly disappears. “What the hell?”

“What the fuck?”

Adam's voice almost matched his own word for word, tone for tone. Showing the years of understanding and connection between them. And it also completely matched the surprise in his own voice.

**Adam**

“What the fuck?” He'd felt the almost connection between Sutan and Tommy, he'd felt Sutan's pain the moment it had started and he'd felt the moment Sutan's pain stopped. Usually that kind of headache would lay his bonded low for two or three days but Tommy had just taken the pain from Sutan though by the look of it neither of them had a clue how.

“It just felt like the right thing to do.”

And with those words shy Tommy was back, a Tommy he hadn't seen for a good long time – curling his bangs back to hide the disk and picking at black painted nails. And while he liked that Tommy, it wasn't the Tommy he wanted to see right now and neither did Sutan apparently as they both moved at the same time to crowd Tommy into a joint hug, come cuddle, come (for some unexplained reason) tickle fest.

It was enough to break the tension between them all, both the obvious stuff and the not so obvious but quite understandable stuff. To him, it felt as though a thunder storm had just moved through leaving the sun of a bright clear day behind it.

“Well it's good to know I have something to bring into this then.”

There wasn't much more than a lot of teasing in Tommy's words but there was enough of an undercurrent to have both him and Sutan cuddle Tommy against them again, telling Tommy how much he was wanted, how much they both wanted Tommy. And that what he brought to them was himself and that was the most important thing.

All it took was a shared look between him and Sutan over Tommy's shoulder before they both set about proving to Tommy just how much they wanted him, whether he chose to bond with them or not, how much he'd become part of them and how much he completed them.

Few words were spoken between the three of them and full blown sex didn't happen, it wasn't about that, it was about the connections that they had to each other, about touching and learning. And it didn't matter who's hand was on who's cock or who's lips where kissing who's. Really the touching, the tasting, the sounds drawn from all three of them were the icing on the cake, the very pleasant added extras and bonuses.

The most important thing was what they felt and how they felt it. And that was what made them all human beneath everything else; the need to connect, to love and be loved. Tommy had slipped quietly into both his and Sutan's hearts and he hoped that he and Sutan were beginning to find a place in Tommy's.

Falling asleep with Tommy nestled between him and Sutan was wonderful; and waking up with Tommy still there was even better.

Everything felt in balance and as it should be, he could feel Sutan's contentment over their bond and he could sense Tommy's – he wasn't totally sure how, just that he could and he wasn't going to question it.

And really, after all, what more could he ask for?

What more could they ask for?

What more could anyone ask for?

He knew there was a lot of talking to be had, both between them and with their respective community elders. After all, it wasn't as if you could sweep him under the carpet now was it? And if even if he could be, there was no way in hell he'd let them be.

They deserved better than that.

Maybe it was time they all faced up to their collective pasts and took responsibility for them; okay so he'd never wanted to be any ones role model or wanted to be banging a drum whether it be for equality or anything else.

But sometimes the fates handed you a choice and you either ran with or you hid under a rock.

He'd never been one to hide under a rock. Neither had Sutan.

And if nothing else, the last year had certainly proved Tommy was no shy retiring flower either, whatever face Tommy showed to the world.

But right now, all of that could wait for another day. Today he was more interested in spending time with Tommy and Sutan.

~ End ~

**Author's Note:**

> Written Spring and posted May 2011


End file.
